Rachel Kaufman, freelance reporter » authors

Poetry: The Four Quartets

Rachel — Wed, 12 Dec 2007 15:33:30 +0000

T. S. Eliot is one of those love-him-or-hate-him guys. I’ll have a special place in my heart for The Four Quartets thanks to a wonderful junior-year seminar…hopefully you like him too.

O dark dark dark. They all go into the dark,
The vacant interstellar spaces, the vacant into the vacant,
The captains, merchant bankers, eminent men of letters,
The generous patrons of art, the statesmen and the rulers,
Distinguished civil servants, chairmen of many committees,
Industrial lords and petty contractors, all go into the dark,
And dark the Sun and Moon, and the Almanach de Gotha
And the Stock Exchange Gazette, the Directory of Directors,
And cold the sense and lost the motive of action.
And we all go with them, into the silent funeral,
Nobody’s funeral, for there is no one to bury.
I said to my soul, be still, and let the dark come upon you
Which shall be the darkness of God. As, in a theatre,
The lights are extinguished, for the scene to be changed
With a hollow rumble of wings, with a movement of darkness on darkness,
And we know that the hills and the trees, the distant panorama
And the bold imposing facade are all being rolled away�
Or as, when an underground train, in the tube, stops too long between stations
And the conversation rises and slowly fades into silence
And you see behind every face the mental emptiness deepen
Leaving only the growing terror of nothing to think about… [The Four Quartets, No. 2 'East Coker', III]

It is entirely possible that Eliot was a lunatic. But if so, he is a lunatic whose writings are wonderful to revel in.

Poetry: The Owl and the Pussycat I. The Owl and the Pussy-cat went to sea In...

The Whiskey Robber strikes again!

Rachel — Mon, 10 Dec 2007 14:32:44 +0000

Just kidding. He’s still in prison. (Huh? Catch up here.) But a commenter pointed me toward this recent video of Attila in prison speaking with author Julian Rubinstein. (Chris on viewing the video: “This guy is all over the place! I think we share a brain type.”)

So other than the fact that I’m apparently dating a guy bound for Hungarian prison, cool vid. I wonder why more authors don’t do this type of thing?

Ubiquity and the Web Yesterday, some random surfing led me to Ubiquity, a new...
Neuromarketers get inside buyers’ brains Frito-Lay studied women's brains to help develop an ad campaign,...

Check out this reporter-in-training

Rachel — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 21:09:43 +0000

I am 10 years old. I love airplanes and cats. I like playing on the computer, riding my bike and playing with my friends. I am homeschooled. I live with my nice mom, cool step-dad, my very annoying little sister, and my freaky but very cute cats. I am going to write about everything in my world. [In The Air--matthewmatt.wordpress.com]

10-year-old Matthew has Asperger’s syndrome and learning disabilities. His blog is amazing–not in spite of or because of these disabilities but just because he’s a remarkably literate, interesting 10-year-old kid. He’s on a mission to interview 100 people about their jobs.

7. Do you have a t-shirt with the periodic table on it?
I used to, when I was in high school. It was white, with a blue periodic table. But I don�t have it anymore.
8. What is your favorite color? Why?
My favorite color changes sometimes. Usually it is blue or green or black. Right now it is green, because I just bought some cool green shoes, and I like them.
9. What is your favorite word in Spanish?
I don�t know how to speak Spanish, but my favorite word in Spanish is probably muertos.

I certainly wasn’t doing anything like this at the age of 10. I remember running around the playground trying to avoid cooties and that was about it. This kid is amazing. Go check him out.

No related posts.

The Nanowrimo Approacheth (“Water for Elephants” reviewed)

Rachel — Thu, 01 Nov 2007 14:02:54 +0000

I just finished Water for Elephants last week. This is the New York Times bestseller, the one that looks like it should have an “Oprah’s Book Club” ribbon printed on the front. In short, the kind of book I try to stay away from. (So I’m a book snob. Sue me.) Yet on a whim I snagged it off Paperbackswap.com and on a recommendation from Vox I moved it to the top of my “to-read” list. Glad I did.

Sara Gruen did not get her start as a Nanowrimo author, as far as I can tell, nor was Water for Elephants composed in a month. But her previous book, Flying Changes, is said to have gotten its start as part of the frenetic novel-writing marathon (which, of course, begins today). But enough of that.

The book is set on a circus train in the Depression, in backlots of Midwestern cities that all look the same. Our hero is a young orphaned veterinarian from Cornell. There is a love interest, a five-hundred-pound (or so) woman, a schizophrenic, a dwarf named Kinko, and (as you may expect) an elephant.

Through it all there are occasional references to the present day, where Jacob Jankowski at ninety-three lives out the end of his days in a nursing home. The story is beautifully told, funny at the right parts and horrifying where it needs to be. Jacob’s an immensely likeable narrator at either age, and the ending, though cheesy, is incredibly satisfying.

The very picky reader will notice that Sara Gruen repeats a few well-worn phrases to the point of obnoxiousness, but I would tell the very picky reader to lighten up and enjoy the ride. This is a wonderful story that anyone and everyone can enjoy–even if you’ve never entertained the notion of running away to join the circus.

Nanowrimo 2009 That’s right, folks, I’ve finished Nanowrimo 2009 with a steampunk...
Turning off the taps: FLOW, a cautionary tale IT'S OFTEN TAKEN for granted here that the faucet will...
Reviewed: “Damp Squid” A Damp Squid: The English Language Laid Bare by Jeremy...

Taking Off Emily Dickinson’s Clothes

Rachel — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 15:15:13 +0000

I’m on a Billy Collins kick lately, so here’s an excerpt of one of my favorite Collins poems :

First, her tippet made of tulle,
easily lifted off her shoulders and laid
on the back of a wooden chair.

And her bonnet,
the bow undone with a light forward pull.

Then the long white dress, a more
complicated matter with mother-of-pearl
buttons down the back,
so tiny and numerous that it takes forever
before my hands can part the fabric,
like a swimmer’s dividing water,
and slip inside.

You will want to know
that she was standing
by an open window in an upstairs bedroom,
motionless, a little wide-eyed,
looking out at the orchard below,
the white dress puddled at her feet.
on the wide-board, hardwood floor.

(More: Taking Off Emily Dickinson’s Clothes, by Billy Collins)

Make Old Clothes Fab: Jean Modification WITH THE CURRENT DRIVE to be green and spend less...
Turning off the taps: FLOW, a cautionary tale IT'S OFTEN TAKEN for granted here that the faucet will...
Bug With “Singing” Penis Among World’s Loudest Animals Engineers and evolutionary biologists in Scotland and France recorded the...

Worth Reading: In Search of Bill Watterson

Rachel — Mon, 22 Oct 2007 14:03:02 +0000

New York Magazine links to a Cleveland Scene piece about trying to track down the elusive Bill Watterson, the Calvin and Hobbes creator who virtually disappeared from public life after retiring from his comic strip. Also included is a biography of Watterson. I for one never knew all this about him. I knew the guy was talented and that he refused to sell out (whatever that means)…definitely an interesting read.

Calvin & Hobbes belong to Bill Watterson. Please don’t sue me

But what’s the occasion to link to a 4-year-old article about a guy who hasn’t done anything the media’s paid attention to (or could pay attention to) in years?

Just this: A new biography of Charles Schulz, Peanuts creator, hit shelves earlier this month, and the Wall Street Journal asked Watterson to write the review. And he said yes.

(Aside for DC residents: Biographer David Michaelis will be at Olsson’s Penn Quarter this Thursday at 7pm to discuss and sign copies of Schulz and Peanuts: A Biography.)

Funnier than Fiction: Bill Maher YOU CAN’T SAY BILL MAHER IS AFRAID of offending people....
Ponder Your Career With a Spiritual Search A GUIDANCE COUNSELOR FOR OUR TIME, author/therapist/ex-monk Thomas Moore‘s new...

Dave Eggers is weird.

Rachel — Sun, 22 Jul 2007 13:46:57 +0000

I recently finished Dave Eggers’ first novel, A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. This book messed with my mind. He makes such a big deal in the (very elaborate, gimmicky) preface about how true the book is, that I was inclined to believe none of it. Then, at the end of the paperback edition, there’s a corrections section (“Mistakes We Knew We Were Making”) written in such a different tone that I thought “Oh, these people must all be real.”

Halfway through, I had changed my thesis to “Dave Eggers is sly; this must be all an elaborate ruse to make me believe that these events really happened (not that, for a work of literature, truth really matters).” I was beaten. I had to check the source of all the world’s knowledge: Wikipedia.

On the Dave Eggers page I learn that his sister Beth sued him after publication of the book (thus convincing me, finally, that Beth really did exist and that the novel is indeed based closely on fact), that Eggers is responsible in a way for the superhero supply store I saw so many ages ago in Brooklyn, and something else interesting.

Last Christmas I came across the book “Your Disgusting Head,” a children’s book made up of “facts” about science (why you can’t understand your cat–because he mumbles, obviously; how many tries it took before the guy who designed your ear got it right) by a “Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey.” Now, either they didn’t mention who was behind the books or I didn’t look too hard, but I assumed they were written by Daniel Handler, or maybe John Hodgman. Turns out, they’re the product of Dave Eggers and younger brother Christopher Eggers, who features prominently in AHWOSG.

It’s weird, this moment of convergence, of synchronicity. I feel now like I know Christopher (or “Toph”), though all I’ve done is read about him in a memoir thinly disguised as fiction. And I feel good because now I know this kid is okay and that he’s doing well, and that he’s just as weird as his older brother.

Update December 2007: A lot of people are finding this page via search. Can y’all comment and let me know what you’re looking for? Is this post helping you at all or just distracting from what you’re really interested in?

A Like Affair With Words is back, sort of Playing with graphics, HTML, and CSS is like being on...

Who loves Kurt Vonnegut most?

Rachel — Mon, 02 Jul 2007 13:11:26 +0000

Apparently it’s US Airways Magazine, the inflight mag for the airline of the same name, whose June 2007 issue brags it contains Vonnegut’s last interview. Four times.

Even though they did mention it four times, the bragging wasn’t as tacky as it could have been; I suppose if you’re a magazine and you did happen to stumble into a tragedy like this you still have to promote yourself.

But oh man, it couldn’t have been Rolling Stone? Playboy? The New York Times?

Poor guy.

Tuesday’s Tools: I, Rearrangement Servant For what might be the most random and unpractical Tool...
At Carafe, put a cork in it Lamar Brown is a man with a ready smile and...

Horn-toot #2

Rachel — Mon, 25 Jun 2007 13:14:23 +0000

Here’s a column on GoErie.com that riffs off an earlier blog post I made:

Language to survive its purists

The English language has been destroyed. That’s what language purists would want us to believe, anyway. And for a while, I was with them.

Again, registration required.

Good Morning: Language to survive its purists Erie Times-News Published June 19, 2007 by Rachel Kaufman The...
Reviewed: “Damp Squid” A Damp Squid: The English Language Laid Bare by Jeremy...

LOLcat goes mainstream

Rachel — Wed, 20 Jun 2007 23:39:07 +0000

A coworker pointed me in the direction of this Houston Chronicle piece about LOLcats. Yes, for real. It’s hard to be a twenty-something, cutting-edge Internet hipster and read about cutting-edge hip things written by People Who Just Don’t Get It, but Dwight Silverman is not one of those people.

I remember when my sister and some of her “crew” were interviewed by the local TV station about Dance Dance Revolution. (This was back in the olden days of high school, when we Ruled The Mall. Oh, we were gods back then.) We still have the tape of the segment. I remember the anchor sounding fairly befuddled as she introduced the clip, and it was clear that nobody had really done their research before throwing this thing together.

Same with the proliferation of awful articles about All Your Base, which (as I recall) were all horrendously late and all sported that same tone of “Hey, we don’t think this is that interesting, so we’re not going to try very hard to explain why some people actually do find it interesting.”

But moving on. Silverman’s piece is as timely as something on an Internet fad can be–I Can Has Cheezburger has only been around for a few months, after all–and actually explains, with details, why someone might be interested in this. (I love the succinct etymology of “I’m in ur base killin ur d00dz.”)

I like this trend (if one can call one story a trend) of reporting on Internet Things with the same seriousness as offline things. (Business stories don’t count. Of course you’re gonna be serious when money is involved.)

Kudos, Mr. Silverman. Kudos indeed.

No related posts.